God's Provision on a Stressful Morning

I have a story to share, and I'm pretty excited about it. However, I do not expect you to be as excited about it as it does not directly pertain to you (it can't hurt to try to apply it to yourself though!).

This morning I was supposed to take an exam for one of my hardest math classes at 8:00 am. I say "supposed to" for a reason. Let me rewind a bit and catch you up.

This semester I had some of the most challenging (and obnoxious) classes I have had in years. This math class was probably tied for the worst along with my other math class- I am a math major afterall. My first test in that course didn't go as well as I'd hope and the second was even worse. I simply could not wrap my head around everything I needed to know. With the help of my family and my fellow tutors, I buckled down and worked even harder to get a better grade. My third test grade jumped up whole letter grades from where I'd been previously and I was so excited to finally understand what I was doing!
The final exam for that particular class was scheduled for this morning at 8:00 am, so I did two things.
1- I tried not to panic or worry about it and thus create undue stress for myself. (In so doing, I procrastinated.)
2- I went through all of my tests and made sure I knew the correct way to answer the problems, not the way I'd done before.
Basically I crammed. That's not what it felt like I was doing, but looking back, that's pretty much how it went down.

So my roommate gave me a deadline of 12:30 am to be finished and go to bed; I finished at 12:30 and got in bed. (Duh.) And of course, I set my trusty alarm for 7:00. I was going to need every single minute in that two and a half hour allotment. Except then I woke up. I looked at my phone and it was off. I don't even remember hearing my alarm- and I'd even tested it last night before I went to sleep to make sure it would go off and be loud enough to wake me up the first time! I looked at my clock... 9:30 am. An hour and a half already out the window, and I still had to clothe myself and get to the classroom. In a matter of less than 10 minutes I was sitting at a desk looking at this exam. I had already panicked on the way there so there was no use in panicking more during the exam. I pulled out my pencil and the permitted notecard and realized, upon further inspection, that I knew most everything on that test paper!! I blew through it, feeling more confident than ever, and finished exactly as the given exam period concluded. (That means it took less than an hour...)

I called my mom as I left to tell her my story and she reminded me that God is a lot more involved in our lives than we remember to give Him credit for. She told me that the adrenaline from waking up so late and freaking out was probably what got me through the exam so quickly. Isn't it fascinating how God always knows exactly what we need? I may have wanted to be there before the door was unlocked, mentally preparing myself for what doom awaited me, but God knew I could do it, and would do better, if He turned off my ears to my alarm for the first hour of the exam. (Which goes back to that God timing :) He's never late and never early. His timing is perfect, even if you think it's not.)

My challenge to you for this week, or the weekend at least, is to rely on God to provide exactly what you need exactly when you need it. Don't rush Him, that will stir impatience and disappointment in you, and who really wants that when you could have peace and joy?

Go(o)d Timing!

I have wanted to write something all day, but I couldn't think of what to say. On my way back to school this evening I heard a story on the radio and my heart just wanted to cry out to the woman through the radio waves and phone lines so she would know that she is being prayed for. But, alas, I could not do that. So I contented myself with an earnest prayer to God, hoping that she would physically feel His presence and comfort. During my prayer, God and I had a little chat. Actually, it was more like I talked and God listened. But He's a very good listener.

God's also very good at responding to me when I've composed myself and moved my thoughts away from whatever was frustrating me so. Tonight's response came in the form of a friend's blog. She wrote this almost a month ago, and I typically read her posts relatively soon after she writes them, but I hadn't taken the time to read it until a few moments ago. This exerpt is God's message to Rachel  (aka you never know when God may be using you to speak to a friend- or total stranger):

"We were not created to live comfortably in defined spaces. The day you chose to follow Jesus was the day you gave up your rights to be satisfied with being comfortable. You are an exile in this world, this is not your home - no wonder you feel so out of place compared to the world. Keep waiting. Waiting does not mean stop - it means close your eyes, open your ears, take a step, and trust Him. "
-I Prefer Harmony Please

God took the words I spat at him in the car earlier and spat them back at me, almost verbatim. (Keep in mind it's holy spit since it's from God.)

Be encouraged. God loves you and He desires you. Don't be discouraged because you can't find a place here. You're not supposed to! And just because you feel like you're in a rut doesn't mean that God is in a rut or that He's just going to leave you there. He's waiting for you to ask Him to help you, because He wants to help you.

I wrote this on November 7 and for some reason never posted it. Reading back over it, I like it :) So I'll let you read it, too:

There is so much I want to tell the world, so much I want the people inhabiting it to know and understand. Yet I can rarely think of the words or take hold of an opportunity or think of what one thing a person most needs to hear first.

Lately, I have been learning about the beauty of God and of genuine joy. I first learned about real joy a few years ago when I realized that I had it. It was this feeling, this sense and presence that could carry me through struggle and pain and rainy days with a smile on my face and a glow in my heart. That is how I describe joy. Insufficient, I know.